Dear lord, help. I feel so weird. It's guy stuff again. This guy: I instinctively feel he's not right, but I am also interested, in great part, I think, because he's pleasant, not an obvious asshole, and seems so willing. Please god, don't put me through the wringer. I am happy to explore sex and finish this. Not even that would also be fine. Don't make me feel what I'm feeling now. Take away the fear, panic and desire to cry. Register the distrust of privilege, the lack of real things to talk about, that this is also banal, that this means shit. Make me whole, put back the chipped away parts.
Bad English is my birthright
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