Saturday, July 22, 2006

Laughter and Forgetting

My friend was using my cell with her sim card, so ended up losing some messages which I'd stored so I could always have them. Since they are no longer there, here's the best place to transfer them.
My fav. fantasy once used to be how it would be if a dear one died. Since baba, I live in fear. Death isn't something you play around in your imagination. I don't get it at all, and if I have to talk about it, I shall do so with respect. Wish it wasn't that, that you mind your way out of fear. Coz the frivolity about death is only a way of dealing with the fear and incomprehension of it, and even grants a more genuine respect than fear ever could. But I'm a little bogged down by what happened. It'll take a bit of time, I guess.

Well for the sms es:

"There's somethung about the continent that's just akin to Bruce"- I sent that one.

"Si si"- that's her, going into paroxysms of approval


It had occurred to me while reading The Songlines. Was reading Utz and looking at Chatwin's pic yesterday. He looked so beautiful, fragile and self-contained. And kinda peeved. Jerry Bauer's photograph. Wonder who he was.
And again you have to wonder why he had to die at 49. There's no logic to explain this. But what am I saying. And it's a totally ruthless platitude to say that his, or baba's or anybody else's for that matter, that there work in this life was done and so they, so to speak, bowed out of life. In my fallen intelligence, this doesen't console. And sure, despite the blah that faith is that which you don't understand. Dear dear A.da

9 comments:

olidhar said...

if i may say this --
don't u worry about him.

olidhar said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
At a loss for a blogger handle said...

is the stuff on memory to be censored ? tell me what is to be kept away. will write accordingly. the sms bit was necessary, i thought. or did u mean the duster bit?
and who's looking anyway.(hee hee hah!)

At a loss for a blogger handle said...

my worry abt bruce chatwin' mine. you shall not put an embargo on mes amours

At a loss for a blogger handle said...

done

olidhar said...

actually, we can't really worry about chatwin any more. not in so many gentle hands, anyway. was actually asking u not to wory about the possessor of gentle hands. .

At a loss for a blogger handle said...

was not worrying abt him. was remembering fact that it was he who had said that faith is without basis, and was feeling glad to have been told it.
amar student takeo funda diyechhi: the only way to write is to write. now you know what a pilferer i am

olidhar said...

pilferereepeferereferer!!!!!!!!!!!

At a loss for a blogger handle said...

girl gone berserk